I was in the dressing room of a plus size store.
I was staring at my reflection in the mirror.
I was transfixed… because a girl who I did not recognize was looking back at me.
My thoughts began racing 100 miles per second: how did I get that big... how did I become that out of control... how could I do this to myself? I collapsed back onto the dressing room bench, and put my head in my hands. I cried my heart out. I finally acknowledged that I was killing myself, that I was digging my own grave with food, alcohol, and carelessness. It was one of the darkest moments of my life, followed by one of the most enlightened. I looked back up at the mirror and promised the girl with tears in here eyes that I would do better. That's how I took my life back. It was as simple and as complicated as that... and my life changed forever.
Two and a half years later, I am down over 100 lbs and committed to living an active lifestyle with a focus on health and sustainability. No crash diets, no gimmicks… just hard work and good food. While this blog will mainly be focused on relationship with food and amazing recipes that have allowed me to lose weight without ever feeling deprived, I will also discuss other aspects of my fitness journey. To start, I'd like to share 5 things that I learned while losing over 100 lbs:
1. Success will not be a consistent upwards climb.
Your weight loss or fitness journey will not look like a beautiful graph chart with an arrow consistently moving up and out from either axis. My success graph chart looks a little more like a toddler with a marker had tried to draw a straight a line… and we all know how that would turn out: marker on the carpet, the walls, the ceiling, and eventually up their nose. Plateaus and setbacks will happen whether you’re doing everything right or not. Neither is an excuse to stop nor to give up. Every good or bad choice you make is having an impact on your body whether you see it or not. Keep going.
2. Invest in yourself and your health.
I used to tell myself that I could never afford a trainer, but when I began my journey, I sat down and calculated all the money that I was spending on enabling my unhealthy lifestyle. I spent hundreds every month on junk food, Starbucks coffee, alcohol, fast food, meals out, plus size clothing, and my increasing stack of doctor’s bills from obesity-related illnesses. So I took that money, and invested it in myself instead. A good pair of sneakers and training sessions. It was the best gift I ever gave myself.
3. Rest is part of the program.
When our motivation is strong, especially in the beginning of our journeys, it’s easy to go all in and to push ourselves every day. Unfortunately, that’s how we burn ourselves out and set ourselves up for injury. I train 6 days a week and schedule a rest day. If I need more than one rest day a week, I take it. Learn to listen to your body, and know that when you’re tired. It’s okay to rest, but not to give up.
4. Take note of your Non-Scale Victories.
The number on the scale is an important one, but it is not the only way to measure health and fitness. It is so easy to fixate on that number, and to become discouraged when it moves slowly or not at all. I take note of several measurements as part of my bigger picture approach. I take progress photos in the same clothes, in the same pose, from the same angle, and with the same camera biweekly. I take body measurements every month: neck, shoulders, chest, waist, hips, thighs, calves, and biceps. I notice my mile getting faster, I notice my squat getting heavier and I notice my jeans getting bigger- all of which still happen when the scale isn’t moving.
5. Comparison is the most exquisite form of self-destruction.
Do not compare your body, your weight, or your progress to other people. We all carry weight differently, we lose weight differently, and we will have different results. There is no cookie cutter program that works for every person because we are all so different! Be flexible and open-minded, but find what works for you, and keep going.